Is it him...or me?

[Magnumcharger]

The problem:
My brother in law - Jerry - I've known since he was four years old (1979). I introduced him to Mopars and treated him like a brother all the while he grew up.
He now has numerous cars including an SRT8 Challenger and a 1967 Hemi Coronet.
Eventually, he found himself a woman that agreed to live with him (and put up with his shit!).
Several years go by, and they're living common law.
One day he asks me if I'd be the best man at his wedding?
I said "certainly!"

Several more years go by. We discuss this wedding, which has been put off due to him not being employed adequately. He still wants me to be best man.

Jerry and his bride-to-be more out west in 2004. Several more years go by. He starts a trucking business, it does well, and he decides to do the deed.
Without telling me, he hires a Justice of the peace and picks a date. I find out, call him and tell him I'll be there to do my bit.
He says "don't bother, there's nobody going to be there but the JOTP and us". So all is good.
Come to find out he had another guy as best man.

Should I be pissed off?

[404NOTFOUND]

No. The reality is, moving far away can change a lot of things.

[stripedelete]

no

[terrible one]

I wouldn't be upset about not being best man, it's the fact that he didn't have the balls to tell you straight up.

[Old Moparz]

Should I be pissed off?

No, leave that crap to the wimmenz, it's their job to get pissed off at dumb s**t like not being asked to be the bridesmaid when they didn't want to be the bridesmaid in the first place because of something the bride said to them 22 years ago in 8th grade gym class when some guy she had a crush on was there to hear it.  

Just be thankful that you didn't have to buy a plane ticket, it's more money to spend on your car.  

[Vainglory, Esq.]

Well, he lied when he said no one would be there but the JOTP, so that's a bitch move.  But it's over; what are you gonna do?

[Fred]

He should have been up front with you but what's done is done. Chalk it up to another one of life's lessons.

[68X426]

I wouldn't be upset about not being best man, it's the fact that he didn't have the balls to tell you straight up.

I think terrible nailed it. 

Don't be a girlie man - like Jerry. Move on.

[TK73]

Well, of course you should be upset...   

[bull]

What the...? This thread was not started by MoparManJim?

[MoparManJim]

What the...? This thread was not started by MoparManJim?

Sorry Bull.... but "no" it was not.   

[tan top]

Should I be pissed off?

No, leave that crap to the wimmenz, it's their job to get pissed off at dumb s**t like not being asked to be the bridesmaid when they didn't want to be the bridesmaid in the first place because of something the bride said to them 22 years ago in 8th grade gym class when some guy she had a crush on was there to hear it.  

Just be thankful that you didn't have to buy a plane ticket, it's more money to spend on your car.  

don't give it a second thought  ,

[skip68]

I would tell him that you're upset and he owes you.   If it was me, I would say this ............ 
"Tommy, since you screwed me out of being at the wedding can I at least be there for the divorce? "   
That's how I roll.   

[Troy]

I can't stand weddings. If I ever get married you can stand in for me and karma will be balanced once again.

Really, I've had lifelong friends get married (who I'd expect to be the best man for) and not even invite me to the wedding. At first I'd feel left out and unappreciated but that doesn't last long. I'm generally over it before the divorce. Perhaps they all know I'm cheap and suck at speeches?

Troy

[RECHRGD]

Sue him for emotional distress....  Get enough money so he has to sell the business..... His wife will divorce him and sue him for alimony and drive him into the homeless ranks.  That's what I'd do.....

[RTDaddy]

I wouldn't be upset about not being best man, it's the fact that he didn't have the balls to tell you straight up.

I think terrible nailed it. 

Don't be a girlie man - like Jerry. Move on.

Exactly, BUT, if you're gonna be in it, be in it to the finish.  Introduced best buddy to his first wife, was best man,  then moved him out when it blew up.   

"IF YOU'RE UNDER CONTROL, YOU AIN'T GOING FAST ENOUGH."

[moparstuart]

 i'm guessing this is your wifes brother   if its ok with her ?  just kick him to the curb and move on 

[dkn1997]

What the...? This thread was not started by MoparManJim?

If a celibate female of questionable motive had initiated suspicious relationship with Jerry prior to 2004 and convinced him to move out west...Maybe.  But your not gonna piss in Jim's ear and tell him it's raining for very long so the odds are pretty good that Jim has not hacked magnumchargers IP address and started this thread.  Based on the no balls lying about the best man scenario, this "Jerry" may be predisposed to that kind of sexless pressure.