dead guy

[charger490]

One day a guy dies and finds himself in hell.


As he is wallowing in

despair, he has his first meeting with the devil...



Satan: "Why so glum?"



Guy: "What do you think? I'm in hell!"



Satan: "Hell's not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here. You
a

drinking man?"



Guy: "Sure, I love to drink."



Satan: "Well, you're gonna love Mondays then. On Mondays, that's all we
do

is drink. Whiskey, tequila, Guinness, wine coolers, Tab, and Fresca. We

drink 'til we throw up, and then we drink some more! And you don't have
to

worry about getting a hangover, because you're dead anyway."



Guy: "Gee that sounds great!"



Satan: "You a smoker?"



Guy: "You better believe it"



Satan: "All right! You're gonna love Tuesdays We get the finest cigars
from

all over the world, and smoke our lungs out. If you get cancer - no
biggie,

you're already dead, remember?"



Guy: "Wow...that's awesome!"



Satan: "I bet yo u like to gamble."



Guy: "Why, yes, as a matter of fact I do."



Satan: "Good, 'cause Wednesdays you can gamble all you want. Craps,

blackjack, roulette, poker, slots, whatever. If you go bankrupt, it
doesn't

matter, you're dead anyhow."



Guy: "Cool!"



Satan: "What about drugs?"



Guy: "Are you kidding? Love drugs! You don't mean...?"



Satan: "That's right! Thursday is drug day. Help yourself to a great big

bowl of crack or smack. Smoke a doobie the size of a submarine. You can
do

all the drugs you want. You're dead so who cares."



Guy: "Wow! I never realized Hell was such a cool place!"



Satan: "You gay?"



Guy: "No..."



Satan: "Oooo, Fridays are gonna be tough..."