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Lawyers should never ask a Southern grandma a question...

Started by my73charger, March 23, 2006, 12:49:51 PM

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my73charger

Lawyers should never ask a Southern grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the  answer. In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first  witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand.

He  approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know  me?"

She  responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, r. Williams  I've known you since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me.

You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and  talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."

The  lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?"

She  again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire  state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of  them was your wife. Yes, I know him."

The defense attorney almost died. The judge immediately asked both counselors to approach the bench, and in a quiet voice, said, "If either of you ask her if she knows me, I'll put both of you in jail!"

ChargerRob

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