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Great Craigslist ad

Started by Tilar, January 23, 2013, 05:17:46 AM

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Tilar

No its not mine, I just thought it was funny.

http://lincoln.craigslist.org/cto/3559279516.html

93 Dodge diesel - $6200 (Ohiowa)

Up for sale is probably the last vehicle you will ever need. The good thing is you're probably going to need this vehicle very soon. You see, this truck is able to withstand an EMP attack, solar flares, or whatever it was the Mayans predicted that they screwed the date up on.

It's a '93 Dodge Ram 250.

I know, for most of you that's all I need to say, but I'm a guy that is willing to educate those that have had their head stuck in the sand, driving their hypermilers that get 40 mpg, so I'll give you the rest of the details.

This truck was made in '93 right after Clinton was elected. I think Iacocca knew then that the world was about to end, so he created the last vehicle a true survivalist would ever need. Have you seen the '94s? Yeah, those guys are not gonna make it.

It's got everything you're gonna need: 4 wheel drive....Auto trans...power windows....air conditioning....cruise control. If you're looking for a vehicle with power, look no further. This truck has enough torque that if your goober-assed cousin that has spent the last three years pissing you off finally pushes you over the edge.....You can easily hook up to his doublewide and drag him back into Oklahoma where he belongs.

This truck was painted by Detroit, and detailed by Mother Nature herself. If Dali worked in patina, even he could never hope to produce this beauty.

I drove this warrior truck only about 3000 miles. I couldn't handle the dominance. This type of authority is only designed for certain people. I couldn't cut it, and I knew it. Folks, this truck is an alpha-roll on wheels. (Everytime I would hit the throttle the radio would blare...."THIS IS SPARTA!!!!!" I didn't know what to do, so I'd just get out and start doing pushups until I could completely quote Leonidas when he spoke to Xerxes, "The world will know that free men stood against a tyrant, that few stood against many, and before this battle was over, even a god-king can bleed."

Mucher harder than you'd think when you are "In the moment and being held accountable".

Some of you that aren't quite ready for this type of power may be asking yourselves, "Will this haul a complete model train set?"..."How much imitation crabmeat can I fit behind the seat?"

Well boys, I'm not going to waste your time anymore. This truck is ready to take you to the next level. All you have to do is accept the fact that you're ready to dominate in life. If you're ready to start living life, I don't have to tell you what to do. MOLON LABE!!!!!!!!

Call four zero two three one four 5266.

Those of you wanting to call and help me sell this thing......Don't waste your time. You aren't awesome enough to be involved in this deal.

Dave  

God must love stupid people; He made so many.



rt green

wow. im still laughing my ass off. that was great. thanks for posting that. that ad will probably sell the truck.     bruce
third string oil changer

Indygenerallee

Sold my Charger unfortunately....never got it finished.

hemi68charger

Very cool  !!!   :2thumbs:

....... I'm hoping he's a writer........... If not, he's missed his God-given calling.................
Troy
'69 Charger Daytona 440 auto 4.10 Dana ( now 426 HEMI )
'70 Superbird 426 Hemi auto: Lindsley Bonneville Salt Flat world record holder (220.2mph)
Houston Mopar Club Connection

68X426

Great stuff - where else can you get Mopar mixed with Okie smack and Spartan cult worship?

A fine post, thanks Tilar.  :2thumbs:




The 12 Scariest Words in the English Language:
We are Here from The Government and
We Want to Help You.

1968 Plymouth Road Runner, Hemi and much more
2013 Dodge Challenger RT, Hemi, Plum Crazy
2014 Ram 4x4 Hemi, Deep Cherry Pearl
1968 Dodge Charger, 318, not much else
1958 Dodge Pick Up, 383, loud
1966 Dodge Van, /6, slow

Robert96

Perfect..... Thanks for the laugh

41husk

1969 Dodge Charger 500 440/727
1970 Challenger convertible 340/727
1970 Plymouth Duster FM3
1974 Dodge Dart /6/904
1983 Plymouth Scamp GT 2.2 Auto
1950 Dodge Pilot house pick up

kokxville

 :smilielol: thanks for posting.Laughing my ass off  :2thumbs:
1969 Charger R/T 4 speed A33 Track Pack.
1967 Dodge a108 360 Magnum. Daily driver
1969 Dodge Charger"the car you can take your kids in to school on a friday,go shopping on a saturday,dragrace on a sunday and go to work on monday"

Tilar

Yeah I thought it was good. I even pushed the button to add a vote for it for the "best of craigslist".
Dave  

God must love stupid people; He made so many.



warpspeed


68CoronetRT

This was hilarious! I sent the wife a link and all I got in response via text was "You just bought that Mopar... you dont need another car"... few texts later she finally got the fact that it was a joke!!!

Very funny stuff!