FARM BOY

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  A young farm boy from Plains, Georgia goes off to college, but half
   way through the semester, he has foolishly squandered all his money.?
   He calls home.

   "Dad," he says, "You won't believe what modern education is
   developing!
   They actually have a program here in Athens that will teach our dog,
   Ol' Blue how to talk!"

   "That's amazing," his Dad says.? "How do I get Ol' Blue in that
   program?"

   "Just send him down here with $1,000," the young farmboy says.? "I'll
   get  him in the course."

   So, his father sends the dog and $1,000.

   About two-thirds through the semester, the money again runs out.? The
   boy calls home.

   "So how's Ol' Blue doing, son," his father asks.

   "Awesome, Dad, he's talking up a storm," he says, "but you just won't
   believe this - they've had such good results they have started to
   teach the animals how to read!"

   "Read!" says his father, "No kidding! How do we get Blue in that
   program?"

   "Just send $2,500, I'll get him in the class."

   The money promptly arrives.

   But our hero has a problem.? At the end of the year, his father will
   find out the dog can neither her talk, nor read.? So he shoots the
   dog.

   When he arrives home at the end of the year, his father is all
   excited. "Where's Ol' Blue?? I just can't wait to see him read
   something and talk!"

   "Dad," the boy says, "I have some grim news.? Yesterday morning, just
   before we left to drive home, Ol' Blue was in the living room, kicked
   back in the recliner, reading the Wall Street Journal, like he
   usually does. Then he turned to me and asked, 'So, is your daddy still
   messing' around with that little redhead who lives in town?' "

   The father exclaimed, "I hope you shot that son of a bitch before he
   talks to your Mother!"

   "I sure did, Dad!"

   "That's my boy!"

   The kid went on to be a successful lawyer.