So...What kind of a job can a person train for...

[Daytona R/T SE]

So...

What kind of a job can a person train for...

That involves absolutely ZERO contact with live humans ?

[Tilar]

Lets see here, there probably aren't many that have ZERO contact but here are a few that would probably have minimal contact... such as  Satellite repairman, Titanic restoration technician, Mobile Submarine mechanic just to name a few. Yeah it's goofy but that's just the sort of day it's been.    

[Daytona R/T SE]

Lets see here, there probably aren't many that have ZERO contact but here are a few that would probably have minimal contact... such as  Satellite repairman, Titanic restoration technician, Mobile Submarine mechanic just to name a few. Yeah it's goofy but that's just the sort of day it's been.    

OK...

Taking notes here...

More suggestions please.

[JB400]

Are you just tired of people in general or wanting a new job?  You could read a thermometer and a wind vane at Antartica or Greenland.  Archeologist in Siberia looking for frozen mammoths.  Also, you could be a zoologist and go looking for yeti in the Himilayas.  A buoy cleaner in the middle of the oceans.  Give me more time, I'm sure I can think of a few more

[XH29N0G]

Prospecting or exploration? 

[ACUDANUT]

A job at the zoo ?

[Chad L. Magee]

Research scientist working on extremely toxic materials or extremely contagious viruses, where you are basically a team of one.  Granted, you will still have to occationally contact your boss for updates, but that may be done remotely by computer depending upon the situation/location.  There is also the field of computational chemistry (calculating new explosive materials is an example) that can be done remotely via secured links to supercomputer systems.....

[BananaDan]

A diver?  Like a salvage diver, or maybe an underwater welder?  They probably make good coin too!

[hawkeye]

keep the job you have and just don't shave, shower, or brush your teeth.  i'm betting people will leave you alone.   

[twodko]

How about a fire watch? You know those guys who live in those tall watch towers in the middle of the forest and watch for forest fires.

[ACUDANUT]

Maybe a lone Man on mars to report how fun it is

[kab69440]

I dunno. I'm still trying to find one that just pays a liveable hourly wage or salary. As much as I despise dealing with morons and incompetents, the money would be far more important. You can come train in DBAS with me, no one comes around because no one wants to get stuck helping to fix the hundreds of problems that chronically plague the process.

[NJRBros]

Perhaps a mortician? And if you REALLY want to distance yourself from the living, you could put two large mailboxes on the front steps labeled "Incoming" and "Outgoing" 

Am I a terrible person? 

[Daytona R/T SE]

How about a fire watch? You know those guys who live in those tall watch towers in the middle of the forest and watch for forest fires.

That, would be PERFECT !

[Daytona R/T SE]

keep the job you have and just don't shave, shower, or brush your teeth.  i'm betting people will leave you alone.   

Tried that.

Didn't work,

I just started to blend in with the unwashed masses.

[Daytona R/T SE]

I dunno. I'm still trying to find one that just pays a liveable hourly wage or salary. As much as I despise dealing with morons and incompetents, the money would be far more important. You can come train in DBAS with me, no one comes around because no one wants to get stuck helping to fix the hundreds of problems that chronically plague the process.

"DBAS"

Development Bank of American Samoa  

[Daytona R/T SE]

A job at the zoo ?

Nope, humans visit the zoo in large numbers.

[Daytona R/T SE]

Maybe a lone Man on mars to report how fun it is

No, that F-ing Marvin guy lives there...

[Bobs69]

How many people would work on a Solar Panel Farm?

[kab69440]

I dunno. I'm still trying to find one that just pays a liveable hourly wage or salary. As much as I despise dealing with morons and incompetents, the money would be far more important. You can come train in DBAS with me, no one comes around because no one wants to get stuck helping to fix the hundreds of problems that chronically plague the process.

"DBAS"

Development Bank of American Samoa  

Direct Blade Assembly System
My job us to babysit two 2500# presses and robotic assembly machinery that makes inserts for the two (pump and turbine) of a torque convertor.  Basically my job is to stand in the middle of this ridiculous mechanical clusterfxxx and do everything by hand because none of it actually functions. The process is roughly 60% moving parts that don't need to exist in the first place. It is without question the most maddeningly ludicrous exercise in futility that it has ever been my sorry misfortune to be burdened with.

[Daytona R/T SE]

I dunno. I'm still trying to find one that just pays a liveable hourly wage or salary. As much as I despise dealing with morons and incompetents, the money would be far more important. You can come train in DBAS with me, no one comes around because no one wants to get stuck helping to fix the hundreds of problems that chronically plague the process.

"DBAS"

Development Bank of American Samoa  

Direct Blade Assembly System
My job us to babysit two 2500# presses and robotic assembly machinery that makes inserts for the two (pump and turbine) of a torque convertor.  Basically my job is to stand in the middle of this ridiculous mechanical clusterfxxx and do everything by hand because none of it actually functions. The process is roughly 60% moving parts that don't need to exist in the first place. It is without question the most maddeningly ludicrous exercise in futility that it has ever been my sorry misfortune to be burdened with.

I'll have to look around for you tommorow morning after I pass through the gates of Hell.

Sounds like you work at the same exact place I do.

[kab69440]

My condolences... Be sure not to smile or wave. That may constitute happiness and we do not permit that on company time. Please also keep in mind our policy prohibiting "Thinking on-the-job". Have a productive workday!

[hatersaurusrex]

Go into politics, then your coworkers are no longer 'human'

[mrsskip68]

A job at the zoo ?

Nope, humans visit the zoo in large numbers.

YES THEY DO AND ARE EXTREMELY RUDE AND ANNOYING! Take it first hand from someone who has worked at a zoo as a caretaker. Their kids are horrible and slam their hands on quiet exibits, tease animals, throw things that can kill or harm said animals!  And when you figure out which inbred person IS the parents they just shrug it off!!!!! Makes me wanna line them up and do a whole "Row-Slap!" 

How about underwater basketweaving?

[Cooter]

The Presidency/politics. Afterall, you haven't got to think about humans, no contact with humans, and basically, you can only care about yourself.