Disregard 2012 End of World Date, New Mayan Calendar Found

[Old Moparz]

Oh well, this means I still have to keep making mortgage payments after December.   

I never believed 2012 is going to be our last year, Bigfoot is just a hairy drunk lost in the woods & not a primitive ape, Jim Morrison & Elvis have both been dead for a long time, & won't be back, & finally, we won't ever get to see a modern 2 door Charger except for a few photoshop projects.   

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Nevermind the Apocalypse: Earliest Mayan Calendar Found
By Stephanie Pappas, LiveScience Senior Writer | LiveScience.com

http://news.yahoo.com/nevermind-apocalypse-earliest-mayan-calendar-found-180438279.html

The oldest-known version of the ancient Maya calendar has been discovered adorning a lavishly painted wall in the ruins of a city deep in the Guatemalan rainforest.

The hieroglyphs, painted in black and red, along with a colorful mural of a king and his mysterious attendants, seem to have been a sort of handy reference chart for court scribes in A.D. 800 — the astronomers and mathematicians of their day. Contrary to popular myth, this calendar isn't a countdown to the end of the world in December 2012, the study researchers said.

"The Mayan calendar is going to keep going for billions, trillions, octillions of years into the future," said archaeologist David Stuart of the University of Texas, who worked to decipher the glyphs. "Numbers we can't even wrap our heads around."

[RECHRGD]

Oh great!!!!  Now I've got to see if I can return all the guns, ammo and dried food I've been storing up on.....

[PocketThunder]

But, but, but......   

[Old Moparz]

Sorry PT, but Dick Clark will be back.

Our Dick Is Fine

Dick Clark Says His Death Was a Blooper, Vows to Return to Times Square for 2013


Thursday, 19 April 2012 - Written by Michael Balton

Times Square - Dick Clark has no intention of resting in peace. The television pioneer has brushed off the massive heart attack which led to his death earlier this week, and is busy planning his traditional New Year's Eve broadcast from New York's Times Square.

"Funniest thing. I was at the doctor for my weekly heart exam," Clark said. "He gave me a 95 for the beat, which I thought was pretty good. 'A Hard Days Night' only got an 86, and that was the damn Beatles for God sakes.

"But the next thing you know, I'm fading to black. Luckily, my pal Ed McMahon was there to pull me through. Hi oh!"

Clark says he plans to change the title of his holiday show to "Rockin' Resurrection With the Late Dick Clark."

"We were going to call it 'Strokes, Heart Attacks & Practical Jokes,' but we realized it's tough to play New Year's for laughs," Clark said, adding that he would be hosting the show all by himself this year.

Asked if the public would accept his return, given his demise, Clark replied: "My condition shouldn't be a problem. They seem to like that stiff, Ryan Seacrest."

As to the musical lineup for his holiday show, Clark referred to the Righteous Brothers' hit "Rock 'n Roll Heaven."

"All of the heavy hitters are right here, just like the song says," Clark said. "I was going to sign them up myself, but the devil is in the details, so maybe I'll let him handle it."

Clark's immediate family was caught somewhat unawares by his plans for resurrection. They had reserved $25,000 for the construction of a pyramid in which he was to be interred. The money will be used for some lovely parting gifts instead.

[jar1292]

This is great news! i vowed three years ago to have the car finished by then so i could die doing 100 at the stroke of midnight..... only problem now the car is still years out now from finish! i met the love of my life and had to put the car on hold. three months into it she left me, still cant get the car done cuz of the wedding bills, we were seperated longer then the marriage lasted..... One question that i have, can the calendar pick and choose that the world will end for certain peaple!!!  O Mayan king please get back with me on this ASAP

[Tilar]

How would they know if it was the earliest calendar?  Maybe there was one earlier than that that they havent found? The plot thickens! 

Anyway, now that they found the "earliest" calendar, someone will come probably along and say the one showing the end was an updated calendar because the "earliest" calendar had a mistake. 

[A383Wing]

So the end is in December 2012, huh?

will this happen before or after Christmas?? ...just making sure so I don't have to budget Christmas money this year

Bryan

[mauve66]

damn, i just ordered a motor on a credit card from Indy motors, figured by the time they got around to collecting it would all be over

[myk]

Bah, we don't need any calendar to bring about the end of the world, the human race is ending the world just fine on its own...

[TUFCAT]

Bah, we don't need any calendar to bring about the end of the world, the human race is ending the world just fine on its own...

It's only 10 days away and nothing weird has happened yet - or has it? 

[69rtse4spd]

Bah, we don't need any calendar to bring about the end of the world, the human race is ending the world just fine on its own...

How true.

[Fred]

Bah, we don't need any calendar to bring about the end of the world, the human race is ending the world just fine on its own...

You have summed it up.

[Old Moparz]

Bah, we don't need any calendar to bring about the end of the world, the human race is ending the world just fine on its own...

That's much more plausible, but we will still have cockroaches & Keith Richards around.

[Dino]

Bah, we don't need any calendar to bring about the end of the world, the human race is ending the world just fine on its own...

That's much more plausible, but we will still have cockroaches & Keith Richards around.

Funny enough, when I read that all I could think was poor cockroaches... 

[HPP]

Maybe they were right. We loose twinkies, the world ends, there are no other food stuff that would survive the apocolypse other than twinkies. Makes sense to me...

[bull]

A guy I work with has a brother who's all freaked out about this Mayan calendar BS. So much so that he's leaving his farm in Oregon for a cabin in Montana with his wife and adult son, daughter-in-law and grandson next week sometime with a large cache of weapons, ammo, food and other supplies, as well as $15k worth of gold and silver. What I don't get is why he would leave a large, high-production farm in a mild climate to go tough it out in a remote cabin? Seems like it would be easier to feed five people with the produce of a working farm rather than a scant supply of wild game in the middle of winter. But obviously logic doesn't play a big role in his decision making process.

[oldgold69]

somebody watched too many prepper shows

[Fred]

Why bother moving at all if the world is coming to an end? Or is only part of the world coming to and end and we all go and live in the other part?

[mauve66]

the poles will reverse and then the polar ice cap will extend down into lower US, good part is all the illegal mexicans will finally go home.......................

[Tilar]

"The Mayan calendar is going to keep going for billions, trillions, octillions of years into the future," said archaeologist David Stuart of the University of Texas, who worked to decipher the glyphs. "Numbers we can't even wrap our heads around."

It's probably a Chinese take-out menu written in Mayan.

[Fred]

"The Mayan calendar is going to keep going for billions, trillions, octillions of years into the future," said archaeologist David Stuart of the University of Texas, who worked to decipher the glyphs. "Numbers we can't even wrap our heads around."

It's probably a Chinese take-out menu written in Mayan.

[Old Moparz]

Told ya back in May.   

[4cruzin]

Dammit .. . . I traveled all the way down to the Mayan ruins to witness this first hand and nothing happened  . . . WT F?    Now I have to pay the mortgage . . . .

[oldgold69]

if you went to the ruins what happened to the jello  you eat it       [did you see the jello commerical]