Tomorrow starts another stage in the family's life

[hemi68charger]

No, not the Apocalypse. Some know, Kim and I have been the only caregivers for my Mom over the past 6 years as her Dementia has progressed. She's at 7th/End-stage Dementia now. She recently had a bad fall and fractured her upper femur. Soooooo, she's been in rehab for quite awhile. Well, she's gotten to the point where it takes two people to get her up into her wheelchair, ready to bath, in and out of her bed, etc.. You get the picture... Tomorrow I pick her up from the rehab hospital and take her to her full-time assistant living facility. She doesn't have hardly any income, but makes a $100 too much for State medicaide. Of course, if she didn't have anything, she'd be eligible like so many others without any form of insurance ( for whatever reason ). Kim and I found a very nice and clean private home that specializes in memory-care patients. Soooo, that's where she'll go.

It'll be weird not having Mom around and even my 6 year old Julie laminated about not having Grandma around any more, that she loved her.. That was hard to hear. But, Kim and I have finally gotten to the crossroads of taking care of Mom because it's the right thing to do and totally sacrificing family time together away from the house. In the past 6 years, we as a family have been able to get away for only 3 or 4 times and that cost us a bunch to put Mom in respite. Now, Mom will be getting the proper medical, daily and social care she needs and we as a family, the kids, Kim and I, can on occasion just lock the doors to the house, get in the Ram and just go......

To all those who have been down this road already, God Bless you. For those on the road now, God Bless you and for those that will do the "right" thing, God Bless you.

God Bless my wife and kids caring for Mom, I love you Kim...
Life happens.........

[twodko]

I walk that path now with my sweet bride.
Bless you, Kim and your Mom right back Bro.

[68X426]

It's known as the Long Goodbye.

And it's not fair.

Been there, and have one there now.

Hope you can find peace. Dan.

[cdr]

prayers with ya'll ,my wifes mom has lived with us for the last 7 years & has now had some strokes &  now they are talking hospise,the suffering is what breaks my heart!


also praying for YOU & wife TWODKO

[JB400]

I understand what your going through.  Friend of the family laid his wife down last week.  She had dementia real bad.  She knew who she was and what not and understood the concepts of doing stuff.  ( For example, when she'd make a sandwhich, she'd put peanut butter and jelly on a ham and cheese sandwhich)  Either way, he sold his farm where she spent the last 50 years and moved to town and sold everything in the house.  She got to where she'd get lost in the neighborhood trying to go home.  He had to lock the doors from the outside to keep her in.  She recognized people, but didn't know names or relations.  Last July, he put her in the home where she fell down and broke her neck.  Moved her to another home with better care until she quit eating couple weeks ago and that was that.



Sad to hear your mom has dementia.  It's not real fair to everyone. All I can do is wish you, your mom, and the rest of your family the best of wishes.

[1970Moparmann]

Sorry to hear this Troy...

There are many evil illnesses out there.  Going through a broken/replaced hip on my mom right now.  Each one of us unfortunately has a book of good and bad.   Keep your head up!

[charge69]

Life can be a real test dealing with the many problems of growing older and having that horrible disease that takes away memories! I will pray for you and your Mother knowing how hard it can be for all involved.
Rest easier knowing you are doing the "right thing" for your Mother.
So sorry you have to go thru this, Troy but, as it has been said, life is not easy, especially for the elderly.

Carl

[hemi68charger]

Thanks everyone......... I appreciate your thoughts.. There are so many of us in the same boat...

[resq302]

Troy,

So sorry to hear this.  my grandmother just got released from a rehab center and is home now but will be going into independant living on jan. 2.  It sucks to get old.   

[jar1292]

God bless  it has affected my family as well. I know it sound rude but when they lose them selves they are no longer there and you pray for god to take them under his arm as soon as they are ready.... this part is not about dementia but I remember sitting with my grandpa numerous times after he finally lost his eyesight. I remember he would sit there and say that he wished that it was time for him to go that he had no reason to be here any more with out his farm... all he did was poke around the garden,(literally) It was all he had left after he realized he could not milk the cows or take care of the farm anymore... But when he couldn't even see his peas or corn all he would do is yell at grandma for coffee and toast and when I would stop buy he would tell grandma "JR is here, were going out to chase girls and if your lucky when I come back I got a young filly to take care of me" she would laugh and say to me "thank god but he wouldn't know what to do with one!" It was all good jokes. but I did learn not to take new girls that I had been seeing over to meet grandpa!


My prayers will be with you and your family tonight.

[Chargen69]

So sorry to hear your struggles, a friend of mine just lost his mom today to alhemizers at 65, way to young for that.

[hemi68charger]

So sorry to hear your struggles, a friend of mine just lost his mom today to alhemizers at 65, way to young for that.

Oh Man !!  65? I lost my Dad at 52 back in '97.. But, that was a quick situation. I can't imagine Dementia/Alhemizers at 65.. You are correct, way too young... May she rest in peace and your buddy find comfort in knowing she's in a better place....

[Cooter]

Sorry to hear. Own grandmother went through this as well...Sad.

[nh_mopar_fan]

My parents are in their mid-70s. Still living in the same house and healthy and very active.

I can still see the day coming.

God bless you and your family.

[Chryco Psycho]

I don't really have much to add , it is a hard part of life to deal with watching parents suffer & not wanting to lose them or see them suffer anymore . Hang in there Troy