A Blond woman and her daughter . . . rated pg-13

[SeattleCharger]

An blond woman and her daughter were riding in an old station wagon one cold, blustery January day. The daughter said to the mother, "My hands are freezing cold."

The mother replied, "Put your hands between your legs. The body heat will warm them up." So the daughter did, and her hands warmed up.

The next day, the daughter was riding with her boyfriend, and he said, "My hands are freezing cold."

The daughter replied, "Put them between my legs, they'll warm up."

The next day, the boyfriend was again driving in the car with the daughter. He said, "My nose is freezing cold."

The daughter replied, "Put it between my legs. It will warm up." He did, and his nose warmed up.

The next day, the boyfriend was once again driving with the daughter and he said, "My penis is frozen solid."

The next day, the daughter is driving in the station wagon with her mother, and she says to her mother, "Have you ever heard of a penis?"

The slightly concerned mother says, "Sure, why do you ask?"

The daughter says, "Well, they make one hell of a mess when they defrost!"

[twodko]

 

[learical1]

A couple were headed to a formal 'black tie' event on a cold January evening.  Their car was parked in their heated garage, and they knew the event had valet parking.  In order to keep the tux and evening gown wrinkle free, they forgo coats and jump into the car to leave.  About halfway there, they have a flat tire.  The man, grumbling because he has no coat or gloves, goes to change the flat.  After about 10 minutes, he gets back into the car complaining his hands are so cold that he can't feel his fingers.  His wife slides up her evening gown, spreads her legs and says, "warm your hands here."  Soon his hands are warm, and he's back outside the car, changing the flat.  Ten minutes later, he's back inside the car, warming his hands between his wife's legs.  One more trip outside, and he finishes the job.  He gets back into the car, and begins to warm his hands again before continuing their journey.  His wife looks at him and asks, "Aren't your ears cold, too?"