How to Tell if You are a Car Guy

[Magnumcharger]

How to Tell if You are a Car Guy

The Feb. 2010 issue of Road & Track had an amusing list of indicators
of a "car guy." These are my favorites:

1. You have a whole drawer filled with cruddy slightly rusty hose
clamps.

2. Jay Leno's Garage seems like an island of enlightenment and perfect
sanity in a world gone mad.

3. Your air compressor is slightly larger than the refrigerator in your
house.

4. The only time you use foul language is when you're alone in your
garage and things go really wrong- which is every 5 minutes.

5. There is no day so bad that the sight of a buff-colored issue of
Hemmings in your mailbox doesn't dissolve all worldly cares.

6. You own more than one floor jack.

7. When you go house hunting with a realtor, you automatically reject
any home without a 2-car garage or room to park a car trailer.

8. Half the money you earned in your 20s was given to a man in a Snap-On
Tool truck.

9. You have a wall locker in your garage containing at least 8 cans of
motor oil of different brands and viscosities.

10. You imagine that someday you might own an old beater of such low
status that it won't bother you to mix brands and viscosities while
doing an oil change. That day, however, never comes.

How to tell if your "female friend" is a CAR GIRL:

1. She either smiles or gets upset at the brand loyalty you display on
your jacket/shirt/hat

2. She's more interested in going to the drag races than going to the
mall

3. She openly encourages you to "make that ricer your bitch".

4. She prefers the smell of gasoline and oil on you than Calvin Kline or
Armani

5. She actually drag races, and her car isnt just her daily driver

6. When you get into an argument..she demands you settle it at the strip

7. She watches Top Gear, Muscle Car and Horsepower TV more than The
Hills, Laguna Beach and Real World.

8. Vanishing Point, Bullitt and Death Proof are in her DVD collection
instead of Twilight, The Notebook and The Devil Wears Prada.

9. She can tell you the history of the Hemi, LS-6, Cobra Jet and
others..from heart.

10. When she first sees your new Musclecar (or whatever) she immediately
asks what its 1/4 mile ET, trap speed and what mods you are planning.

Other indicators:
You own a cherry picker.

You own more than one pair of jackstands. (Even if one set is made out
of cheap stamped metal, that you almost never use.)

You own (or have owned) more than one set of ramps.

You got tired of using the floor jacks and/or the cherry picker whenever
you needed to drop the engine cradle out of your "other" car, so you had
a gantry crane (aka "the swingset from hell") constructed. Only because
you don't have room for a lift.

When your wife hears the "blue streak" emanate from under the hood of
your car, she gently reminds you, "Remember. This is what you do for
fun!"

You own more than three 15mm combination wrenches, not including the
Gear Wrenches. (This may be just a GM thing.)

You can recite, from memory, the list of tools you'll need to remove the
previously mentioned engine cradle.

You have worn out at least one trouble light.

You own a compression, vacuum, and fuel pressure gauge.

You own a timing light and a dwell/tach meter. And can still use them
both. Even though the instructions are long gone.

You still hang on to that 25 year old Thermo Quad. Just in case.

You own any kind of automotive tuning software.

You know who TunerCat is.

You own a scan tool.

You wince just a bit whenever you see any kind of OBD1 GM code reader for sale.

If you've ever "baked on" freshly rattlecan enameled engine parts in your kitchen oven.

You have at least one car on your property which is rusting away on blocks but you claim that one day will be worth a lot of money once you
get around to restoring it....or....Every old car you own, you also own a parts car for it.

[tan top]

that is soo true  

[Tilar]

Man, a lot of them are true! 

3. Your air compressor is slightly larger than the refrigerator in your
house.  About the same size.

6. You own more than one floor jack. One is air

8. Half the money you earned in your 20s was given to a man in a Snap-On
Tool truck. Guilty as charged

You own a cherry picker. Yup

You own more than one pair of jackstands. And they're not the cheap stamped metal ones.

You can recite, from memory, the list of tools you'll need to remove the
previously mentioned engine cradle. Used to know all clearances and torque specs for GM 350's, and the 350 and 400 turbos

You have worn out at least one trouble light. at least

You own a compression, vacuum, and fuel pressure gauge. Doesn't everybody? 

You own a timing light and a dwell/tach meter. And can still use them
both. Even though the instructions are long gone. Yup

You still hang on to that 25 year old Thermo Quad. Just in case. Yeah and it's in Texas and 35 years old not 25. Sure could use it now.

You wince just a bit whenever you see any kind of OBD1 GM code reader for sale. Got one... Still in the box...never been used.

[71ChallengeHer]

3. She openly encourages you to "make that ricer your bitch".     guilty 

[LeadfootBob]

How to Tell if You are a Car Guy


7. When you go house hunting with a realtor, you automatically reject
any home without a 2-car garage or room to park a car trailer.
Damn straight! Turned down an otherwise perfect place because there was no garage, everybody thought I was crazy except my friend who bought his house because of the garage that came with it


You have at least one car on your property which is rusting away on blocks but you claim that one day will be worth a lot of money once you
get around to restoring it....or....Every old car you own, you also own a parts car for it.
Ehe... Hehe... Yeah.