Sayings that stick with you

[General_01]

This one has stuck with me since I saw "The Outlaw Josey Wales".

"Don't piss down my back and tell me it's raining"

[restoman]

Crazier than a bag of hammers
dumber than dishwater
Its so cold, it'd freeze the nuts of a tractor
So dirty, it'd turn a pig from a gut wagon
Hornier than a ten peckered billy goat
He comes from a broken home - he broke it himself
He ain't the shiniest hubcap on the wall

[dodgecharger-fan]

Keep eatin' like that and you'll shit through the eye of a needle at 10 paces.

[dkn1997]

from Grandma;

If you eat standing up, you will get fat feet

[devilgear]

If I see a hot girl I allways say:

"she's so hot she'd make a Bishop kick a hole in a stained glass window"

[Bandit72]

"just cause you ain't paranoid, don't mean they ain't out to getcha" - Steve Earle

[oldschool]

you are writing checks that your ass cant cash

the older i get the better i was

its better to be a has been than a never was

talking about being in hot weather:
im hotter than a co*k sucker at a wennie roast
im hotter than a catholic priest at a little league game

when i was young,i would tell my uncle that i was going to whip his ass,his reply:
that would be like trying to stick cooked spagetti up a wild cats ass

you might do it but your not going to like it

[Mike DC]

Steve Earle is cool.   

[Steve P.]

1) Don't cut off your nose to spite your face..

2) Don't burn any bridges..

3) Lipstick on a pig... 

4) I just don't see it...........     

5) You are what you eat...   This can go many ways.....   

[TK73]

Six 'a one, half-dozen of another

[The70RT]

What time is it? Half pass a monkeys as & a quarter to his balls.

[68charger383]

measure twice, cut once

fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me

[Plumcrazy]

Dumb as a stick on a windy day

[Lowprofile]

"Built like a Brick Shithouse" 

[Bandit72]

keep on keepin on
keep it 'tween the ditches
damn the bad luck
you'll have that with them bigger jobs
yippie-ki-yay mother f*cker



i'm sure i'll think of alot more as time goes on

[Ghoste]

If stupid were oil, you'd be the Middle East.

[restoman]

If clues were shoes, you'd be barefoot.

My cousin had widely spaced buck teeth growing up - my sympathetic Mom used to say "he could eat corn on the cob through a picket fence"

If someone was bow legged - "he couldn't stop a pig in an alley"

[smoking66]

"You know why guys chase girls? Because it feels sooooo good..."
My dad giving me a drunken sex talk when i was about 6 years old, ill remember that saying for the rest of my life.

[lazarus]

 That old boys about two chicken legs shy of a picnic.

[41husk]

I told this to one of my wrestlers.  he didn't believe me when I told him it was song lyrics.  "If you can't be with the one you love, love the one your with"  He actually burned the song on CD and played it on the next trip

[skip68]

Work smarter, not harder.   

[PocketThunder]

"I gotta go see a man about a Horse"   

[ITSA426]

This whole thing is slicker than owl snot!

[andy74]

my uncle once told me about some chick"there are many ways to say i love you,but screwing is the fastest"

[General_01]

Slicker than snot on a brass door knob.
He's a few cards shy of a full deck.