Becoming Illegal (Actual letter from an Iowa resident and sent to his senator)

[Shakey]

My Boss (an American citizen) sent me this today for a laugh.   



          The Honorable Tom Harkin
           731 Hart Senate Office Building
           Phone (202) 224 3254
           Washington DC, 20510

Dear Senator Harkin,

   As a native Iowan and excellent customer of the Internal  Revenue Service, I am writing to ask for your assistance. I have contacted the Department of Homeland Security in an effort to determine the process for becoming an illegal alien and they referred me to you.

   My primary reason for wishing to change my status from U.S. Citizen to illegal stems from the bill which was recently passed by the Senate and for which you voted. If my understanding of this bill's provisions is accurate, as an illegal alien who has been in the United States for five years, all I need to do to become a citizen is to pay a $2,000 fine and income taxes for three of the last five years. I know a good deal when I see one and I am anxious to get
the process started before everyone figures it out.
    Simply put, those of us who have been here legally have had to pay taxes every year so I'm excited about the prospect of avoiding two years of taxes in return for paying a $2,000 fine. Is there any way  that I can  apply to be illegal retroactively? This would yield an excellent result for me and my family because we paid heavy taxes in 2004 and 2005.

   Additionally, as an illegal I could begin using the local emergency room as my primary health care provider. Once I have stopped paying premiums for medical insurance, my accountant figures I could save almost $10,000 a year.

   Another benefit in gaining illegal status would be that my daughter would receive preferential treatment relative to her law school applications, as well as "in-state" tuition rates for many colleges throughout the United States for my son.

   Lastly, I understand that illegal status would relieve me of the burden of renewing my driver's license and making those burdensome car insurance premiums. This is very important to me given that I still have college age children driving my car.

   If you would provide me with an outline of the process to become illegal (retroactively if possible) and copies of the necessary forms, I would be most appreciative.
Thank you for your assistance.

           Your Loyal Constituent,
           


           Burlington, IA

Get your Forms (NOW)!! Call your Internal Revenue Service  1-800-289-1040.

Please pass this onto your friends so they can save on this great offer!!!!

[bull]

There's no doubt being an illegal alien is a good deal. Some states have added benefits on top of what's mentioned in the email. In most cases in this country the most well-off people are either really rich or really poor and it's the middle class that gets screwed.

[41husk]

Sign me up

[Ponch ®]

There's no doubt being an illegal alien is a good deal.

[Charger_Fan]

That's funny, I wonder what sort of reply (if any) the author got in return?

There's no doubt being an illegal alien is a good deal.

What...it's true.

[red72chrgr]

I wanna sign up too!

[RallyeMike]

I have not heard of this tax change, but the rest of the letter is just pure stupidity:

He can drop his health insurance and use the emergency room as his care provider anytime he wants.
He can let his drivers license expire any time.
He can drop his car insurance any time he wants.

But why would you want to subject yourself to the same jeopardy as illegals?

I have never heard of any program where being an illegal alien get people preferential treatment to get into college. Skin color - yes. Economic - yes. Not simply because you are an illegal alien.

No need to write the govt anyhow. You can renounce your citizenship anytime you please, so go ahead and sign up ! http://travel.state.gov/law/citizenship/citizenship_776.html

the most well-off people are either really rich or really poor and it's the middle class that gets screwed.

My guess is 10 out of 10 people will take "middle class and screwed" over "most well-off and really poor". The really poor are not the most well off, just the most helped. Poverty blows.




   

[nh_mopar_fan]

The newly elected leftist moonbat governor of the People Republic of Massachusetts has proposed in-state tuition for illegal aliens that want to attend state colleges.

[RD]

The newly elected leftist moonbat governor of the People Republic of Massachusetts has proposed in-state tuition for illegal aliens that want to attend state colleges.

In Kansas, a very conservative state, but proportionately has a high percentage of illegal immigrants, there is a law on the books that allows for illegal immigrants who have attended Kansas public schools to obtain resident tuition rates for college if they go ahead and sign an affidavit stating that they will attempt to become citizens of the United States.

So my argument is this.  A person from Missouri, who is a citizen, who has either paid taxes or their parents have paid taxes are going to be charged out of state tuition for their legal child to attend school in Kansas, but the illegal immigrant does not have to?  Sorry, I understand to a degree that this is to help them out, but it boils down to this, it is not fair that those who are here legally are penalized for their citizenship.

They should just charge everyone the same rate in my eyes if this travesty is to continue.

[RallyeMike]

The newly elected leftist moonbat governor of the People Republic of Massachusetts has proposed in-state tuition for illegal aliens that want to attend state colleges.

... and I see was voted down heartily.

In Kansas, a very conservative state, but proportionately has a high percentage of illegal immigrants, there is a law on the books that allows for illegal immigrants who have attended Kansas public schools to obtain resident tuition rates for college if they go ahead and sign an affidavit stating that they will attempt to become citizens of the United States.

Thanks for the info, though it's still not preferential treatment over Kansas residents or others from out of State. They are being treated the same as every other US citzens (not that I entirely agree with this concept). The policy of pushing them toward legal citizenship matches the currect efforts of the US Govt. to get illegals, legal.

Illegals support the US economy in a significant way. Reality is that the US Govt is not likely to ever put in place an effective program to systematically find and toss illegals out because it hurts the economy, and a poor economy loses elections. Giving illegals equal opportunities to be educated and helping to assure they are self-sufficient is, in the long run, good for all of us. I don't want to have to support them.

[bull]

The economy has nothing to do with it if you're talking about politics. The Republicans turn a blind eye because they like providing their buddies with cheap labor and the Dems turn a blind eye because they want the votes. It's has everything to do with those bozos staying in power and nothing to do with the overall good of this nation. If it helps the economy (which I don't think it does) it's at most an incidental benefit, not a purposeful one.

The reason I think it doesn't help the economy at all is because there's no plan to stop the inflow. Fine, keep putting illegals through college on our dime and there'll be four waiting in line for every one that graduates. We can't continue to support the illegals who are already here without stopping the influx of those who cross the border demanding the same treatment. Right now it's a viscous cycle with no end in sight and no one has the ball$ to stop it because they are only worried about themselves and their political careers.

Also, does anyone else think it's at all odd that the word "illegal" gets thrown around in topics like this and it means virtually nothing? It seems to me that this is the only "crime" that gets you rewards instead of punishment.

[RD]

Also, does anyone else think it's at all odd that the word "illegal" gets thrown around in topics like this and it means virtually nothing? It seems to me that this is the only "crime" that gets you rewards instead of punishment.

no argument with that statement, its totally true!

[RallyeMike]

The reason I think it doesn't help the economy at all is because there's no plan to stop the inflow.

Cheap labor certainly benefits some of the measures of the economy. Population growth helps drive many of the economic indicators. Yesterday it was reported that they estimate 25% of the construction industry forces nationwide are illegal aliens. What would happen to the economy of they were somehow able to boot them all out tomorrow?

The is no doubt that the whole mess is caused by politicians.

[Ponch ®]

. Fine, keep putting illegals through college on our dime and there'll be four waiting in line for every one that graduates.   

So you're afraid of what a bunch of college educated Mexicans would do? I don't see what the big deal is. As far as illegals "not paying taxes", its not like when they go to McDonald's and order a Big Mac Value Meal they say "oh, I'm illegal...I don't have to pay the extra 40 cents for the sales tax".

Illegals aren't bad for the economy, for reasons that RallyeMike already explained. It's also a myth that illegals take the jobs from Americans - if it was, the unemployment rate would be at around 15-20%, not 6% (the same as it was back in 1955, coincidentally). Yeah, they do the work for less money, but that's capitalism. Next time YOU want to build a house, I wonder if you would be willing to pay an extra hundred grand or so in labor costs just so you can say you hired good ol' boy American workers who, by the way, will also demand benefits, overtime pay, and paid vacations.

There is no risk of being overrun by illegals either - most either go back to their countries after a few years or stay and eventually legalize themselves, move up in the socio-economic ladder (thanks to the opportunities that this great land offers us), and become productive members of society. It really all boils down to good old fashioned bigotry and xenophobia - Americans (of any race, for that matter) tend to have a fear of accepting those that don't "look like us". First it was the Chinese in the mid 1800's, then the Irish, and then the Italians. Now it's the Mexicans.  But we'll get over it.

[chargerboy69]

. Fine, keep putting illegals through college on our dime and there'll be four waiting in line for every one that graduates.   

So you're afraid of what a bunch of college educated Mexicans would do? I don't see what the big deal is.

The big deal for me is that I am paying for it. And it is for someone who is here in this country illegally. I did not have anyone pay for my eduacation, my wife did not have someone pay for hers. If paying for someone elses college education does not bother you, then I can foward $30,000 of my wifes student loan bills to you.

[Shakey]

First it was the Chinese in the mid 1800's, then the Irish, and then the Italians. Now it's the Mexicans.  But we'll get over it.

Let's not forget about the Indians that greeted the Mayflower.   

I think nowadays it's the Muslims that are the target of fear.  I don't know why.   

Like all immigrants, from way back when up until today and into the future, you're gonna get good ones that are willing to work and support their family and you're gonna get bad ones that are gonna find a way to milk the system.  It's not really fair to paint them all with broad strokes of the brush.

[bull]

. Fine, keep putting illegals through college on our dime and there'll be four waiting in line for every one that graduates.   

So you're afraid of what a bunch of college educated Mexicans would do? I don't see what the big deal is. As far as illegals "not paying taxes", its not like when they go to McDonald's and order a Big Mac Value Meal they say "oh, I'm illegal...I don't have to pay the extra 40 cents for the sales tax".

Illegals aren't bad for the economy, for reasons that RallyeMike already explained. It's also a myth that illegals take the jobs from Americans - if it was, the unemployment rate would be at around 15-20%, not 6% (the same as it was back in 1955, coincidentally). Yeah, they do the work for less money, but that's capitalism. Next time YOU want to build a house, I wonder if you would be willing to pay an extra hundred grand or so in labor costs just so you can say you hired good ol' boy American workers who, by the way, will also demand benefits, overtime pay, and paid vacations.

There is no risk of being overrun by illegals either - most either go back to their countries after a few years or stay and eventually legalize themselves, move up in the socio-economic ladder (thanks to the opportunities that this great land offers us), and become productive members of society. It really all boils down to good old fashioned bigotry and xenophobia - Americans (of any race, for that matter) tend to have a fear of accepting those that don't "look like us". First it was the Chinese in the mid 1800's, then the Irish, and then the Italians. Now it's the Mexicans.  But we'll get over it.

First of all, I never said one thing about Mexicans. There are probably just as many illegal Romanians and Russians where I live as there are Mexicans. And as you hinted at, a sales tax is imposed on everyone who buys anything, legal resident or not (except in Oregon). If you want to talk about income tax we can have a discussion.

The reason I said they are harming the economy is because those who have jobs and pay taxes have to pay for the services the illegals use. Someone has to pay and it all comes out of our pockets through higher medical insurance costs, higher taxes, etc. Your example of other races who really did face racism does not hold water because back then those people were forced to carry their own weight. I'm sure they got some charity through friendly neighbors, and maybe the govt. even kicked in some back then, but I can guarantee you there was nothing available then like the govt. infrastructure that perpetuates poverty and dependence present today.

The problem crosses all the racial boundaries but it boils down to the fact that a certain percentage of the population does not want help getting out of their problem situation. IMO the Mexicans on the whole seem to work harder than any of them to get ahead and that's good. I just wish they would do it legally and I wish the laws were enforced. There's plenty of room here for everyone, so why can't they just wait their turn, calm the F down, fill out the paperwork like everyone else does and go through the proper channels? You don't see people jumping over the desk at the DMV to get their license renewed before everyone else. Why do we let it happen at the border?

I suppose it's possible that the illegals are confused by the setup here in the US. On the one hand they see and hear about all the govt aide available to them and the fact that there is no actual punishment for coming here illegally and setting up camp. But once they get here they experience all the animosity of those who actually have to pay for their services from our middle class pockets. Therefore, dare I say the politicians are out of touch with those who elected them? Yes. And that brings me back to my previous post where I wrote that "It has everything to do with those bozos staying in power and nothing to do with the overall good of this nation." They don't care if we have to pay for illegal immigrants as long as they stay in power.

[RD]

. Fine, keep putting illegals through college on our dime and there'll be four waiting in line for every one that graduates.   

So you're afraid of what a bunch of college educated Mexicans would do? I don't see what the big deal is. As far as illegals "not paying taxes", its not like when they go to McDonald's and order a Big Mac Value Meal they say "oh, I'm illegal...I don't have to pay the extra 40 cents for the sales tax".

Illegals aren't bad for the economy, for reasons that RallyeMike already explained. It's also a myth that illegals take the jobs from Americans - if it was, the unemployment rate would be at around 15-20%, not 6% (the same as it was back in 1955, coincidentally). Yeah, they do the work for less money, but that's capitalism. Next time YOU want to build a house, I wonder if you would be willing to pay an extra hundred grand or so in labor costs just so you can say you hired good ol' boy American workers who, by the way, will also demand benefits, overtime pay, and paid vacations.

There is no risk of being overrun by illegals either - most either go back to their countries after a few years or stay and eventually legalize themselves, move up in the socio-economic ladder (thanks to the opportunities that this great land offers us), and become productive members of society. It really all boils down to good old fashioned bigotry and xenophobia - Americans (of any race, for that matter) tend to have a fear of accepting those that don't "look like us". First it was the Chinese in the mid 1800's, then the Irish, and then the Italians. Now it's the Mexicans.  But we'll get over it.

I can tell you that I am neither xenophobic or a bigot, what I am is a taxpaying citizen.  The question is basically broken down to this, either you are a legal citizen or illegal.  That is it.  There are many immigrant worker programs that are used in the U.S. to bring in individuals on work visas to handle the positions that, said, capitalism makes available.  Yes, these jobs are needed, but by God you do not have to be illegal to get them.  Those on work visas are here legally, they have gone through the system, are accounted for, and kept track of.

This is the way the system was developed and this is the way it should be maintained.  By us admitting to the illegal immigrants status in this country and desensitizing ourselves to the concept of their existence within OUR society, we overlook their criminal actions and see other ways (through rose colored glasses) to maintain a sense of mediocrity and inaction.

We all talk about how the illegal immigrants are a drain on our system, and yes they are.  They do not pay income taxes, hence, I do not care how much sales tax is gained by them buying bread at wal-mart a month, it will not equate to how much they could be providing this country through the taxing of their income.

They are ineligible for health insurance due to their illegal status, hence the states pay for healthcare costs for these individuals when they are unable to pay the bills, I.E. THE CITIZENS OF THE UNITED STATES.

They will not have a 401K or a retirement plan, so when they are unable to work, they will again attempt to receive services through the local SRS agency, and again... the citizens will pay for it in some way shape or form.

Do they provide a service to our economy?  Yes, they do.  Can this service be accomplished legally?  Yes, it can.  Is it? NO.  And that is where I have a problem with illegal immigrants.

[chargerboy69]

. Fine, keep putting illegals through college on our dime and there'll be four waiting in line for every one that graduates.   

Illegals aren't bad for the economy, for reasons that RallyeMike already explained.

Really? I just don't get that one. We pay for their education. We pay for their welfare services.  In some cases we pay for them to collect Social Security, which is amazing to me. We pay for them to be in our legal system. We pay for them to be in jails. We pay for their medical care.

And when some do not pay Federal Income Tax, and then most send their money back to Mexico, yea, thats not so bad. . 

[CharlieCharger]

In Houston..there is a mess of hospitals that are in bad shape because a MAJORITY of illegals are using the E.R system and NOT paying..and obviously don't have health insurance, for silly reasons of bringing there kid in for a stuffy nose or a scraped elbow..I've seen it with my own eyes..so anybody wants who to argue my statement can come down and stay with me for a week and we will sit in the E.R..It's sad some one with chest pains or something serious has to wait in the E.R because some kid has a runny nose..In Houston, Illegals are not MINORITIES..Tax paying citizens are.

In before the lock 

[Ponch ®]

There's plenty of room here for everyone, so why can't they just wait their turn, calm the F down, fill out the paperwork like everyone else does and go through the proper channels? You don't see people jumping over the desk at the DMV to get their license renewed before everyone else. Why do we let it happen at the border?

That's easier said than done. First, it's not exactly cheap to obtain a visa or "the paperwork", and if you do somehow manage to scrounge up enough money to do it, you have to wait months (or years) to do it. When you're desperate to feed your family and coming here is the only option, I doubt you have time to wait. Do you think they like coming here illegally? I bet if it was up to them they'd do it legally but it just isn't that simple. I know quite a lot of illegals, and most of them live in fear of getting caught, deported, separated from their families. They like the opportunity that this country offers, but its like living in a guilded cage. You think they don't pay income tax? Most of them have to get fake SSN's to get a job (unless you're a day laborer), and their employers pay taxes on them. They pay into the Social Security system and they'll never see any benefit from it. Hell, I 'was born here  and every pay check is money taken out for Social Security, and I will never see any benefit from it either, the way that system is all screwed up.

Really? I just don't get that one. We pay for their education. We pay for their welfare services.  In some cases we pay for them to collect Social Security, which is amazing to me. We pay for them to be in our legal system. We pay for them to be in jails. We pay for their medical care.

And when some do not pay Federal Income Tax, and then send most of their money back to Mexico, yea, thats not so bad. . 

You also pay for the education, welfare, and disability benefits of Americans who "can't work" because they broke a finger 20 years ago. Let's kick them out too.

That money that goes to Mexico ends up being spent on buying goods - most of which are a product of American manufacturing or distribution.

[Vainglory, Esq.]

. Fine, keep putting illegals through college on our dime and there'll be four waiting in line for every one that graduates.   

So you're afraid of what a bunch of college educated Mexicans would do? I don't see what the big deal is. As far as illegals "not paying taxes", its not like when they go to McDonald's and order a Big Mac Value Meal they say "oh, I'm illegal...I don't have to pay the extra 40 cents for the sales tax".

Illegals aren't bad for the economy, for reasons that RallyeMike already explained. It's also a myth that illegals take the jobs from Americans - if it was, the unemployment rate would be at around 15-20%, not 6% (the same as it was back in 1955, coincidentally). Yeah, they do the work for less money, but that's capitalism. Next time YOU want to build a house, I wonder if you would be willing to pay an extra hundred grand or so in labor costs just so you can say you hired good ol' boy American workers who, by the way, will also demand benefits, overtime pay, and paid vacations.

There is no risk of being overrun by illegals either - most either go back to their countries after a few years or stay and eventually legalize themselves, move up in the socio-economic ladder (thanks to the opportunities that this great land offers us), and become productive members of society. It really all boils down to good old fashioned bigotry and xenophobia - Americans (of any race, for that matter) tend to have a fear of accepting those that don't "look like us". First it was the Chinese in the mid 1800's, then the Irish, and then the Italians. Now it's the Mexicans.  But we'll get over it.

Good God man!  Did you finally see the light?  Whatever happened to "shoot 'em at the border"?

[Ponch ®]

. Fine, keep putting illegals through college on our dime and there'll be four waiting in line for every one that graduates.   

So you're afraid of what a bunch of college educated Mexicans would do? I don't see what the big deal is. As far as illegals "not paying taxes", its not like when they go to McDonald's and order a Big Mac Value Meal they say "oh, I'm illegal...I don't have to pay the extra 40 cents for the sales tax".

Illegals aren't bad for the economy, for reasons that RallyeMike already explained. It's also a myth that illegals take the jobs from Americans - if it was, the unemployment rate would be at around 15-20%, not 6% (the same as it was back in 1955, coincidentally). Yeah, they do the work for less money, but that's capitalism. Next time YOU want to build a house, I wonder if you would be willing to pay an extra hundred grand or so in labor costs just so you can say you hired good ol' boy American workers who, by the way, will also demand benefits, overtime pay, and paid vacations.

There is no risk of being overrun by illegals either - most either go back to their countries after a few years or stay and eventually legalize themselves, move up in the socio-economic ladder (thanks to the opportunities that this great land offers us), and become productive members of society. It really all boils down to good old fashioned bigotry and xenophobia - Americans (of any race, for that matter) tend to have a fear of accepting those that don't "look like us". First it was the Chinese in the mid 1800's, then the Irish, and then the Italians. Now it's the Mexicans.  But we'll get over it.

Good God man!  Did you finally see the light?  Whatever happened to "shoot 'em at the border"?

The whole controversy over the last 2 years or so prompted me to become more informed on the issue. Before my beliefs were reactionary and uneducated. 

[Vainglory, Esq.]

Congrats.  Welcome to the ranks of the enlightened.

[Ponch ®]

Congrats.  Welcome to the ranks of the enlightened.

Not that you'll be seeing me at one of those rallies in Downtown L.A. anytime soon though...