DEAR TIDE

[Back N Black]

  Dear Tide:


I am writing to say what an excellent product you have!
I've used it all of my married life, as my Mom always told me it was
the
best. Now that I am in my fifties I find it even better! In fact,
about
a month ago, I spilled some red wine on my new white blouse. My
inconsiderate and uncaring husband started to belittle me about how
  clumsy I was, and generally started becoming a pain in the neck. One
thing led to another and somehow I ended up with his blood on my new
  white blouse! I grabbed my bottle of Tide with bleach alternative,
to my
  surprise and satisfaction, all of the stains came out! In fact, the
  stains came out so well the detectives who came by yesterday told me
that the DNA tests on my blouse were negative and then my attorney
  called and said that I was no longer considered a suspect in the
disappearance of my husband.
   What a relief! Going through menopause is bad enough
  without being a murder suspect! I thank you, once again, for having a
great product.
Well, gotta go, have to write to the Hefty bag people.

[Old Moparz]

Good one.