Removing Drunks From Your Car Roof (Not For The Body & Paint Section)

[Old Moparz]

Someone was curious about this, so I decided to post what happened. I don't recall the exact time frame, but I'd have to say it was probably well over 20 years ago. (That helps lessen any embarrassment.) Late one Saturday night, after visiting several establishments that serve alcoholic beverages, some friends & I were leisurely on our way home. It was my turn to drive that night, so we were in my car. This was an earlier version of the current designated driver program, but back then the driver was chosen by whoever had the most gas in their tank, & yet still allowed to drink.

One particular friend, who's personality was altered by alcohol more easily than most, needed some air during the ride home. He opened the rear, passenger side window, & at the next red traffic light, climbed out through it & on to the roof of the car. At first I didn't realize what he did, but when he started to bang on the roof & lean over the front windshield smiling in at us, I knew where he went. I yelled to him to get off before he dented it or got us in trouble, but he ignored my requests.

The longer he was on top, the more mad I got. I was also worried about how he "might" attract the attention of a law enforcement officer since passengers aren't normally on the roof. I came up with an idea of moving the car slowly ahead to make my rooftop buddy aware of his situation. He yelled out some kind of cowboy phrase along the lines of "YEEEEHAAAA!" & banged harder on the roof. Now I was really pissed, so when the light turned green I stomped the gas & then the brakes. This removed him quickly from the roof, via the hood.

He picked himself up from his position on the pavement holding his shoulder to ease the soreness. His last words as he got back in the car were "You f%@*&$g asshole!" But he remained inside for the rest of the trip & there were no more drunks on the roof.

[Shakey]

Was that your buddy Opossum Boy by any chance? 

[Charger_Fan]

I had a "friend" like that for a while. The slightest hint of alcohol & he's an absolute intolerable PITA!


I quit hanging around with him...life's too short.