My teen forgets to turn off car-- what to do

[crj1968]

So my son is driving on his permit. Every time we go somewhere and he is driving, he parks, puts the car in park and then just gets out.
He forgets to turn off the car !

My wife has screamed at him I've talked to him about how he is going to ruin the car....or worse leave it running in the garage and kill us.

Not sure what to really do besides not let him get his license until he can pull his head out.

Is there a device...like if the car is in park for 5 seconds the horn starts blasting?

[Ghoste]

Some cars in Europe shut off after idling for a certain amount of time. 

[Troy]

Remove the muffler.

Or teach him to lock the doors every time he gets out. Can't do that without the key (most of the time any way).

Troy

[crj1968]

Remove the muffler.

Or teach him to lock the doors every time he gets out. Can't do that without the key (most of the time any way).

Troy

He'd forget his head if it wasnt stapled to his neck....

[Mytur Binsdirti]

He'd forget his head if it wasnt stapled to his neck....

Is he actually prepared to drive? Tell him he's got a choice; be responsible and smarten up or he'll have to spend his life depending on a bicycle and/or public transportation to get where he wants to go.

[Alaskan_TA]

He'd forget his head if it wasnt stapled to his neck....

There is part of your answer!

Get a truckers wallet chain & hook one end to the key ring & the other to the staple in his neck. 

[polywideblock]

 

            but one end of the keychain should be clipped to his jeans so when he gets out  it reminds him he's left something behind

 I've raised 3  daughters 2 with kids of their own now, makes me feel old       and "forgetting " to do things is just part of being a teen  

[ITSA426]

Buy a Prius, Tesla, or nice new shoes.

[stripedelete]

He'd forget his head if it wasnt stapled to his neck....

Is he actually prepared to drive? Tell him he's got a choice; be responsible and smarten up or he'll have to spend his life depending on a bicycle and/or public transportation to get where he wants to go.

Correct!   Nothing replaces the firm hand of Management.

[Charger4404spd]

Take that privilege away until he starts remembering

[el dub]

Are you trolling?

[crj1968]

He'd forget his head if it wasnt stapled to his neck....

Is he actually prepared to drive? Tell him he's got a choice; be responsible and smarten up or he'll have to spend his life depending on a bicycle and/or public transportation to get where he wants to go.

Well, yeah, that is the discussion at hand....right now we just aren't going to allow it. Otherwise a great kid, but even if he forgets one time it could be a problem... my car beeps at me if I open the door with the car running. So if I'm honest it's possible I could forget also...but in 30 years of driving I haven't.  His car doesn't do that...

He drives pretty good, and it would be REALLY nice for him to drive his own butt around...but it's concerning.

[crj1968]

Am I trolling?   For?


I've thought about a lanyard type thing....

Or maybe a device where you hook one to the keys the other glued to his head and if the two are more than 5ft away from each other it beeps.   

[polywideblock]

 

  suppose it depends on what sort of kid he is , but if he's into chains etc just get on of these and modify  to suit 

http://www.ebay.com/itm/NEW-Dog-Puppy-Metal-Chain-Walking-Lead-Leash-Clip-110cm-Red-Nylon-Handle-C156-/121845569170?hash=item1c5e8fd692:g:l~oAAOSwKIpWARYk

 

mine was a 20" choker chain with 2 dog clips attached     wow that was a long time ago 

[ws23rt]

Sit this kid down and have a calm clear talk about his issue with forgetting to turn off the car.

Tell him that another instance is not acceptable. The warnings and concerns have already been made and the next step is to lose access to the car for 30 days or something of the like.  After that he will only be allowed to drive on his own when he is on his own. -- The key here is the chat. It needs to be clear.---Also if you back out of the ultimatum-- making another one later will have greatly diminished value.

I'm a bit surprised though to hear of this problem.   Does he have this kind of forgetfulness in other areas? It could be a tell of something that needs professional attention.

[tan top]

Take that privilege away until he starts remembering

yeah  ,  &  where ever he , has driven too ,  & forgets to turn off the motor ,  leave him stranded  ! make him walk back  , every time        only way to learn

[JB400]

What kind of car is he driving?   If it's a fairly new econobox that was made in the last 10 years, it could be that it is too quiet.  One idea instead of chain hooked on the key, would be an idiot light that is connected to the ignition switch.  Switch on, light on.  I would try this; if it don't work, no license.

[ws23rt]

What kind of car is he driving?  If it's a fairly new econobox that was made in the last 10 years, it could be that it is too quiet.  One idea instead of chain hooked on the key, would be an idiot light that is connected to the ignition switch.  Switch on, light on.  I would try this; if it don't work, no license.

Good point about the car being quiet.  Electric cars are quiet too.

Learning responsible habits is the relevant part of this topic and the kid needs to learn the basics without regard to what he is driving now. A signal from the car to call him on the phone would work too but is not practical and frankly just makes the phone that much more of a mom.

One thing is true here.--He has learned about how to turn the car on and will not forget that.  If he leaves his car running to go into a store and finds it gone when he comes out he will learn that way about turning it off.  The access to the car being removed is like an owned car being stolen.

[Mopar Nut]

Tie a string to the key and the other end to his phone, he will not forget his phone.

[ws23rt]

Tie a string to the key and the other end to his phone, he will not forget his phone.

---Or tie the key to a nipple ring.

[crj1968]

I dont think he needs professional help- like any kid he forgets crap....like homework and the like. Hes' 15 so you know, I am a realist. He is 500% better kid than I ever was, so I try to cut him some slack.

I think it comes from drivers ed where the kids just swap seats without ever shutting the car off.

its an older BMW 3 series and it runs pretty dang quiet.  I told him no license until he figures it out....if that takes him wearing a nipple ring key chain than so be it.  

I did a see a deal with two tags when they are separated by more than 15feet they go off.

[crj1968]

Tie a string to the key and the other end to his phone, he will not forget his phone.

That's for sure.

[Mike DC]

         
How does he come home & get into a locked house without his keys?

[myk]

He might have two sets of keys; one for the car, the other for everything else...

[birdsandbees]

Make him pay for the next tank of gas, he won't leave it running for long.

[HeavyFuel]

I'm having a hard time believing that you don't know the answer to this question.  Maybe you can't face the obvious facts or you just need to vent to someone.

Your son isn't ready for the responsibility of driving.  He can't remember a simple basic fundamental like turning off the piece of equipment being operated?  Wow.

Please keep him off the road so he doesn't injure or kill someone or himself.

[myk]

How old is he? Just let him be.  He'll either grow up or face the consequences of his actions/inactions...

[A383Wing]

Driving a vehicle is a responsibility, not a right...obviously he's not responsible enough to handle this gift to him...take it away until he's old and mature enough to handle it in the proper manner

[myk]

Or that...

[crj1968]

I'm having a hard time believing that you don't know the answer to this question.  Maybe you can't face the obvious facts or you just need to vent to someone.

Your son isn't ready for the responsibility of driving.  He can't remember a simple basic fundamental like turning off the piece of equipment being operated?  Wow.

Please keep him off the road so he doesn't injure or kill someone or himself.

I think if you read what Ive written I've stated exactly the facts I'm facing....and what the decision has been.   

[crj1968]

         
How does he come home & get into a locked house without his keys?

We come through the garage.

[stripedelete]

I'm having a hard time believing that you don't know the answer to this question.  Maybe you can't face the obvious facts or you just need to vent to someone.

Your son isn't ready for the responsibility of driving.  He can't remember a simple basic fundamental like turning off the piece of equipment being operated?  Wow.

Please keep him off the road so he doesn't injure or kill someone or himself.

I think if you read what Ive written I've stated exactly the facts I'm facing....and what the decision has been.    :shruggy

Read it all.  Whats the decision?

[b5blue]

  This works...you guys go for training drives on a regular basis. Every time he starts to get out of the car with it running punch his arm. The tactile contact will embed the correction. (Like pet training.)
  A friend and I traded stick shift cars, he got my 4 speed and I got his 3 speed floor shift. As we coached each other on driving each others cars he'd punch my arm every time I put the car in reverse at a stop light.     Each error increased the punch I got, it only took a short while. It was his dad's trick when he learned stick.  Teach him never to start the car unless buckled and never to unbuckle with the car running. That way is safest for operation and the law, it also embeds a reminder that gives you a second to punch him.    I'm sure he's just  a bit overwhelmed with everything and part of him just wants to stop the experience as he's use to just getting out when the car stops. 

[440]

I'd say once he gets his full license he's not allowed to park in the garage and then leave him to his own devices. Make him understand he's accountable for whatever consequences result, and don't bail him out. He'll eventually learn.

[crj1968]

I'm having a hard time believing that you don't know the answer to this question.  Maybe you can't face the obvious facts or you just need to vent to someone.

Your son isn't ready for the responsibility of driving.  He can't remember a simple basic fundamental like turning off the piece of equipment being operated?  Wow.


Please keep him off the road so he doesn't injure or kill someone or himself.

I think if you read what Ive written I've stated exactly the facts I'm facing....and what the decision has been.    :shruggy

Read it all.  Whats the decision?

Post 11. That we just arent going to allow him to get his license yet.

I guess the post has two things involved; one the responsibility issue, the other some sort of device that most new cars have built in that could be used. Not just for my kid but anyone, as this issue isnt that uncommon, and its not just kids. I was thinking last night about people who forget kids in cars and stuff like that


Thats a different scenario, where lives could be saved by a tag system. One on a baby's bag or seat and one on key ring.

For the engine running thing...itd be cool to tap in to a signal from when car is in park, to a 5 sec timer, and then blast the horn or an alarm.

[crj1968]

B5 and 440. Both good ideas....and yeah he does want the experience over when driving with his mom. I can relate.

[skip68]

Frickin kids.    
Teaching my son to drive was painful.  He's just not a natural.  He drives Ok now but man, I had the hardest time with him riding the brake pedal and changing lanes.      
My daughter on the other hand is only 13 but told us two days ago she wants a stick shift.    
How many Now days want a stick?  
Good luck and remember to keep your cool.  It's all part of the teaching process.  We're car guys so most of us were probably naturally going to get driving down quickly.  My son was a car guy on PlayStation.    
He'll get it figured out.   

[HeavyFuel]

I'm having a hard time believing that you don't know the answer to this question.  Maybe you can't face the obvious facts or you just need to vent to someone.

Your son isn't ready for the responsibility of driving.  He can't remember a simple basic fundamental like turning off the piece of equipment being operated?  Wow.

Please keep him off the road so he doesn't injure or kill someone or himself.

I think if you read what Ive written I've stated exactly the facts I'm facing....and what the decision has been.   

That's the thing...you aren't facing the facts. 

"Let's see.... (thoughtfully scratch chin while gazing into the distance)      Maybe I can jerry-rig one of those underground electric perimeter fences for dogs into the car.  My kid can wear the collar, and receives a shock when crossing the door sill if the motor is still running.   It's brilliant, I say....BRILLIANT!"

Having two teenage boys that drive, I inquired about the possibility of them walking away from a running car.    The glaring look from them said it all.....that I was fool for even asking.

Sorry to break the news to you, but switching off the engine and taking the keys with you is something 999 out of 1000 beginning drivers master after probably the third lesson.

C'mon, man.   You didn't expect all the responses to be          Some gotta be 

[crj1968]

I've faced the facts. He isn't driving alone until I feel he is ready.

However, reality is; there are alarms and sirens and beeps and blips for leaving your lights on, leaving keys in ignition etc, for a reason. Because people are fallible and forget things. I know I do from time to time.

I appreciate ALL the responses.

[ws23rt]

I've faced the facts. He isn't driving alone until I feel he is ready.

However, reality is; there are alarms and sirens and beeps and blips for leaving your lights on, leaving keys in ignition etc, for a reason. Because people are fallible and forget things. I know I do from time to time.

I appreciate ALL the responses.

I responded to this thread already and my first motivation was that forgetting to turn the car off did not seem trivial.

You mentioned that this habit may have come from his training at drivers ed. If that is true then something is very wrong with the training program. IMO leaving a car running when one gets out is not a safe thing to do for anyone. Just consider the things that need attention to do it.---Put it in park or neutral, set the E brake, not to be done in an enclosed space, Are their toddlers around that want to play in the drivers seat, etc.

Leaving the car running is one thing to forget but the hazards when doing so need attention as well. --- Does he attend to all the other items of hazard after forgetting to turn the car off?
IMO this will pass quickly but that is up to you and it is not something to accept until it does.

[myk]

Lol I did the same thing today; walked away with the car still running...

[XH29N0G]

Just stick with it.  Teaching these kids is a moving and changing target.  My son was for the most part pretty easy to teach.  I start with my daughter in less than two weeks if she passes  the learner's permit test.  I am hoping for the same - well, maybe not exactly - hopefully better, but I am sure there will be tense situations.  

I have a memory burned in of rear ending my dad's charger in the driveway, and looking over to him in the passenger seat.  All he said was 'you might want to back up.'  That was enough.  I learned not to hit my parent's cares.  

OK, sorry for the digression.  The point is that they will learn, or we have to do something.  You are asking for input and I see a plan.  I also think it is important, but mostly in the 'someone will take the car away/or carbon monoxide poisoning might set in/or it is the only responsible thing to do' sort of way.

[crj1968]

Lol I did the same thing today; walked away with the car still running...

   

[crj1968]

I have a memory burned in of rear ending my dad's charger in the driveway, and looking over to him in the passenger seat.  All he said was 'you might want to back up.'  That was enough.  I learned not to hit my parent's cars.

That is funny. I remember two things driving as a "learner."

Once with my mom there was a box in the road, and I was gonna run it over with my mom right next to me. She screamed "There could be a baby in there!"  Lol. I never forgot it and think of it whenever I see a box on the road.

The other with my dad I was driving his truck and just cruising about 45 mph and came up on a busy Denver intersection and just blasted through no looking, no slowing. I mean my light was green. He yelled HOLY SH*T !  And never took me out again. 

My son did great today...no issues and I gave him this advice. When you park, stop, breathe, listen, breathe again... and make sure all is quiet (the radio, the engine, and especially your mind) before you open the door. Seemed to stick.

[myk]

Lol I did the same thing today; walked away with the car still running...

   

What I usually do is forget to take the seat belt off.  This is especially embarrassing when I pull into a cruise, I try to get out and then I'm sucked back into the car lol, and as usual the charger's heavy door always has to slam shut on me...

[1974dodgecharger]

ALL OF YOU BEEN TROLLED 

[myk]

Probably...

[skip68]

What exactly does that mean?  We've all been trolled?   
I thought a troll was a person that floats around a site, makes dumb comments and contributes nothing.   
Crap, that sounds like me.   

[crj1968]

ALL OF YOU BEEN TROLLED 

That's twice this has been said.  I don't get it, I thought a troll was someone who just comes into a thread and plays devil's advocate and try's to piss everyone off.     Oh did you guys know we never really landed on the moon?  

[Baldwinvette77]

Seriously?? Hmmmm chain the key to him, his belt or something, so he can't leave without it 

[tan top]

 all joking aside  ,  maybe because ive been around cars & stuff all my life , well at least  3 or 4 years old  I can remember sitting on the inner fender ( yes really   , watching my dad change out spark plugs  &  doing  service stuff ))  ,&  I just cant see how anyone could  drive a car & get out & leave it running , & go to walk off     hope he gets out of this habit sooner rather than later .

no offence meant  

[crj1968]

I hear ya and no offense taken.   

[ht4spd307]

this may work for ya http://www.ebay.com/itm/3-DOG-TRAINING-SHOCK-COLLAR-ELECTRIC-UNDERGROUND-FENCE-/140424579660?hash=item20b1f50a4c:m:m3XQO8X2p5WMUjFnVIp8y-g just joking

[el dub]

Like this.....https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=quckbuNK_YE#t=21

The tried and true carrot and stick

[crj1968]

Shock collar with head slaps...I like it.

My son had two of his friends over last night and they both admitted to being guilty of leaving their cars running in the school parking lot.
It's an epidemic!  Maybe it's the crazy busy lifestyle they have these days with their stupid phones and constant "something" going on. 

[el dub]

If you could figure out how to get inside a kids head you would become a millionaire

[Mike DC]

   
Haven't any of you guys ever left the oven on in your kitchen? 

A lot of modern vehicles are practically that quiet at idle.  Especially inside the cabin. 


Add in the fact that a teenager has spent their life up to that point always exiting a car without having to turn it off . . . and it's not that hard to imagine this being an issue today. 

[birdsandbees]

Maybe teach him how to lock the doors when he exits!!! 

[rt green]

put a backup alarm on the car and have it activate when he puts it in park.   warm it up in neutral.