Soooo...

[Ghoste]

I'll keep this all short since I tend to prefer leaving my personal life away from the site (which is why I rarely go to the Off Topic area).  Beginning about last November I was pushing to create a new role for myself at work and at that time, my efforts were not getting the desired results.  By the end of December another opportunity came up for me and although it wasn't my first choice it still involved greater responsibility and lead roles and both are things I prefer.  Fast forward to the end of February and a personnel change results in a chance to make my first proposition happen.  Now I have two huge professional challenges in front of me but I felt up to it and accepted the dual positions.
Then on March 1, my mortgage was finally discharged and that's good news right?  Right.  So I went home that night fully ready to celebrate only to be told by my wife that she no longer loves me and one of us needed to leave and she felt it should be me.  I was leaving the next day for work so this little shocker which I absolutely did not see coming and did not support left me reeling.  I was messed up bad and fell into a depression.  I was determined to fight her decision, I loved her, I love my children, so I stopped coming on the site, stopped drinking, got on anti-depressants, avoided extra curricular activity of all sort and concentrated on work and trying to save my marriage.
Speed up to today, and marriage cannot be saved.
And that's about it, I'm back and Im fine.
The End.

[Just 6T9 CHGR]

Wow Shawn, had no idea.  Glad to hear you are on the come back trail though.  We're here for ya bud! 

[Mopar Nut]

Sorry to hear that, but i'm glad to see you back and ok.

[68X426]

Sorry to hear my Canadian brother. As you said, moving forward is best. Hope the new chapter in your life is bigger and better.

[nvrbdn]

wow ghoste, just sucks. right when it looks like its all falling together, someone wants to disrupt the wagon. good to see that you tried with all your might to preserve it, and also see when its time to abandon the sinking ship. your kids are your life now, with your work. good luck with all that has been put on your plate. you are in my thoughts as you go forward.

[Ghoste]

Thanks, there are still some speedbumps ahead, the kids don't know yet and that will be a hard hard day for dad and the day I leave that house will be hard.  Obviously from that you can tell we are still under the same roof putting up a front for the girls.  We are doing that until they are finished school for the year.
But after that, I am going to have a fresh start and more importantly I have a job that I really really love and its just getting better right now so I will be able to throw myself into it.
I did the right thing, I honored my marriage vows and I made a serious effort to save it but its done and things will be good.
I will likely end up closer with my girls too based on what we are currently discussing as far as custody.  I am gone for work a lot so when I am away they will be with her and when I am home they are all mine.  I am home about 60% of the time, this should work out great.

[twodko]

Damn, I am so sorry to hear this. It's so cliche but when one door closes another opens. You are already being very strong and while untenable right now, you will love and be loved again

[Dino]

I'm so sorry to hear this buddy.  But you will be okay, you're a smart guy and you obviously know how to handle things. 

[stripedelete]

Ouch, that's a kick in the stomach.  Very sorry to hear.   Keep your head on and feel fortunate she told you now instead of waiting  5 or 10 years.
I have no doubt there are bigger and brighter days in your future.

[Cooter]

Ghoste, I was just thinking bout you the other night. You were a Worthy debater on the board. We didn't always see eye to eye on alotta things, but I certainly don't wish this on anybody. Hope you come out on the other side better than you went in buddy.

We's here for you Shawn.

[A383Wing]

sorry to hear....but ya still got us

Bryan

[tan top]

 oh Crikey , sorry to hear this Shawn ,
good to see you back !

[JB400]

Sad to hear the wife wants to call it quits.  At least you done your best for your family and were willing to make sacrifices.   At least it looks like your brighter days are ahead of you; maybe even in a 69

Best of wishes to you and your gals   I do hope they understand why you and the Mrs. aren't getting along.

[Ghoste]

I think they will be as shocked as I was to be honest.  We weren't fighting or anything like that and after 25 years you would think I could spot a change coming but I didn't and I'm certain they wont either.
I'll help them through it though.

[chargerboy69]

Shawn, Wow that stinks, sorry to hear that.  I have been through a couple myself, and though they are difficult you will make it through alright. I used them as a new start. . a new beginning. Best of luck. Tim

[Indygenerallee]

Shawn, Ive been in your shoes (as too many guy's have) It is definately hard and I have 2 Children that have went through it(they were little when it happened 1 and 3) but almost 10 years later it's always there, hopefully your ex will play nice, mine did up until I met my girlfriend (now my wife, Yeah what was I thinking glutton for punishment!) then she turned into a royal PITA!! I'll keep you in my prayers!! 

[TruckDriver]

Welcome back, and it is great your got your mind pointed in the right direction. 

[Ghoste]

I don't expect it will all be easy.

[Ram07]

Well, that sucks, feel for ya...been down that road as well  ...Was just told to leave one day! Very sorry.


Now go get what you're looking for, my ex got the house, everything in it, and I owed her 5k somehow!

[JB400]

I know the mentality is to get them for all they got, in a divorce (which it sounds like where you're at), just remember, you still have to put up with her after it's settled. You still have to see her when you pick up your kids and vice versa.  You also have to put up with her at graduations, weddings, and other major events in your kids' lives.

I do think you should get your fair share (especially the charger ) from the divorce, but I think you should do your best to keep things civil.  Right now, you're still the good guy, but daughters do tend to listen to mom's side of the story more than dads.

[A383Wing]

quick story here about this...my son and his wife had issues as well...she "turned gay" after they had their second child...drank a lot, and told my son she didn't wanna be a Mom anymore...

long story short...she got the house, he got full custody of his 2 boys...that's all he cared about...

Bryan

[Ram07]

My Kids had my back as well...especially my daughter...they knew what happened.....that was all that mattered as well!!

[Ghoste]

Obviously my main concern will always be the welfare of my children.

[JB400]

Doesn't sound bitter at all, but what I said was just food for thought. You deserve what you earned.  But like I said, even though she's gone, you still have to put up with her even in key events of your kids' lives.  It's easier to put out a match than it is a California wild fire.  Which would you rather fight?

[Ghoste]

I know its hard to understand without being where I am, but in this analogy I choose the wildfire.  If you had all of the facts available to you I bet you would do the same.